by djtheropy
Control Your Anger
6:58 am in Uncategorized by djtheropy
Everyone gets angry, i bet you do sometimes as well. Anger is a normal human emotion just like happiness, joy and sadness. Anger is good because it allows us to vent and let out any built up emotional and mental pressures that we have been having recently. The downside to anger is that it can also cause a lot of problems, and a lot of upset to others if you do not learn how to control it.
If you experience one or more of the following thing then your anger is out of control.
- Everything (no matter how small) that happens to you or around you annoys you and makes you mad.
- Your anger leads you to act aggressively or violently, that includes yelling, shouting, pushing, punching etc
- A long time has passed since the initial incident that made you angry but you still get angry when you think about the incident. Remember anger is only suppose to be a temporary emotion.
- You start being reckless to cover/deal with your anger, you become self-destructive and start oing dangerous things that you would not normally do such as drugs and fighting.
Now if you think you or a friend has anger problems here are some ways of controlling your anger.
- Seeing the difference between annoyances and valid reasons to get angry is a start, things such as someone getting in your way, slowing you down, being luckier than you, doing better than you or simple being a better person are not valid reasons to get angey. Somone hurting you is a valid reason.
- Before you completly loose your rag, take a deep breath, step back and run out the next 30 seconds of your rant in your head. Is it worth getting angry with?
- If you know what set you off or what triggers you anger, try your best to avoid them, while avoiding them work out a way to react in a constructive way when you are next confronted with them. If it is a someone that makes you angry, the next time you see them, take any anger you have and turn it into determination, determination to be better than them.
- Be orgnanised, not knowing where things are, not having much free time and having to rush around all the time can become very stressful, and will lead to you becoming angry. If you organise yourself and know where things are, chances are you will spend less time looking and more time doing, if your doing things quicker you will have more time to relax and do things you want to do.
- Talk rather than shout, especially if its a someone that has made you angry. By talking about your anger or annoyance to the person you will give yourself a chance to gather your thoughts and calm down a little, plus you get a chance to discuss it with someone out loud.
There are few more steps that you can do to control your anger at that point of time.
1. Count to 10 when you are getting upset. This is a normal way that we have all heard. We have heard it because it works if you practice it. Count to 10 and you may solve many of your outbursts before they happen.
2. Use “I” statements instead of “you” statements. I am frustrated because you didn’t help with the housework, instead of You didn’t help me with the housework. This helps in multiple ways one is your way of thinking is a bit better and you also do not upset the other person so that both parties are angry. Which of course is not a good outcome for anyone.
i have a very short temper and its hard to keep it under control because i am still at school and i dont like it last year when i was in year 10 i got excluded about 5 times for losing it i fight and have ago at everyone it gets my mom and dad upset sometimes but because i have not just got a short temper but i am an anorexic so it gets hard for my mom it hard for me and when things happen in my life gets hard it makes me want to lose it
i try to keep calm by going for a fag but i dont always have some on me so i sit out side or away from people and breathe then go and talk to some one who understands me.
although you have a system for calming down again, the thing you need to tackle is what is causing you to lose it, there must be something that your either hiding from the world or some built up stress that your struggling with.
.-= Mark Else´s last blog ..Eating Disorders: Bulimia Nervosa =-.
i have anger problems , they are so hard to keep dwn& my parents are no help . neither do myfriends – thwy just laugh.
I really lose my temper very quickly and i m becoming a copy of my father and he is not the best example Really i dont want to be like him and i hurt all the people I love.my boyfriend broke up with me because i dont think before talking i always lose it to quickly and at home my mum and my sister always argue with me because of that and i really want to change but i cant
first thing you need to tackle is the reasons behind why you lose your temper, what is it that sets you off?
I get angered by my parents very often. They think me to be a failure and when i top the class or school they will just say its a useless school. This makes me extremely angry and violent and i will break things in the house.